[Shrine Of Guardian Animal Spirits] Fox girl and her Spirit Guide (Stargrace please)

[Saha]

10th brightening, 1st cycle of Cryxatum in the season of Spring, Era I of the Celestial Mandate, Era XV Post Fractum

Saha hurried up the stairs as quickly as possible, her sandals clapped against the stone. For now it didn’t matter, not for her, and the Maikami wasn’t with her. It was a rather warm brightening for fading winter and she wasn’t shivering because she ran all through the streets to the Shrine. Although she knew running wasn’t good she felt happy, and that was most important to her.

The reason for coming to the Shrine was rather strange. Saha herself didn’t really know why she wanted to meet her Spirit Guide the first time in her young life. Maybe it was because a new part of her life began exactly eight brightenings before and she still wasn’t certain enough for herself. Something forced her to come here and so she did. Usually she didn’t believe that spirits could change much, but for a little more confidence they were just fine. Matters of the heart, emotions and doubts – such things were for the spirits, she thought. And she never needed them until now.

When she approached the shrine of the Life Guardians she bowed in deep respect and kneeled down, pressing her palms together and closing her eyes for prayer to Torek. “May my praises reach Torek's heavenly ear”, she began. “I am here to thank You for opening my eyes for my destiny. I was able to choose a new path in my life and it was definitely the right decision, so I have to thank You for giving me the strength and determination to change so many things. But I am also here for asking today.” She hesitated when the new problems and orders of the last days appeared again. “Now I am asking for a Life Guardian, that will give advice and help through this new time. Still I am not sure, but I feel that it would be the right …” Her voice faded and she waited thoughtless, staring at the ground.

[Stargrace]

After Saha's spoken words had been snatched by the winds invisible fingers, a distinctiv feeling almost instantaneously grew. It began with a shiver down the female’s spine. The brightening held its same warmth the suns' light seemed to even penetrate through the darkest of shadows in the shrine's vicinity; however, goose pimples shortly followed the shiver as its little bumps appeared upon her arms. When a large sweeping gaze had been cast around the shrine, everything seemed as it should; three others stood vigil a distance apart from one another with bowed heads and closed eyes; the occasional moving of lips could be seen yet the words were only for the spirits to hear and that was how it remained.

Suddenly the feeling dawned that another presence had entered into the area. The senses could not detect a thing. But as another shiver took hold, the feeling became more intense. This unrevealed presence had its eyes upon the female before the animal spirit silently laughed. Time passed without meaning until finally the senses began to pick up on the subtle actions of the spirit who played by the rules of its own amusing game. First came the feeling of touch as fur brushed past Sasha's hands. Next came the sense of smell; it was a scent familiar to the female; it consisted of the soap she used and the perfume she wore and yet it held a distinct quality not so familiar of wet fur and warm summer plains. And then came the soft patter of steps that seemed to surround the female in a circular pattern.

The last sense to be experienced by Saha was the blurred sight that moved at a fast pace. The sight consisted of an acute muzzle, a small body covered in black coarse fur, a bushy black tail tipped with white, and then in a rush came four black legs with white socks. Before one could truly react to the sight of the fox, the vixen initiated a pouncing technique that was practiced in life from a young age. The vixen's paws landed squarely on Saha's chest and she was knocked to the ground. Apart from a shortness of breath, no pain was felt and an instant later the fox's touch was gone. If it was not for the laughter that rode upon the wind one would almost think their senses and mind had played a trick. However foxes were known for their slyness and in the short amount of time the vixen had observed and heard the human's words, the vixen felt as though she already knew her intimately well.

This showed in the grin that formed upon the spirit's face. The fox now still and thus clearly visible held a contrastd mixture of black and white resembling that of daylight and darkness. The vixen gracefully sat down before the female as its green eyes stared into Sasha's own orbs of similarity. Soft words that seemed to possess both coolness and warmth whispered and caressed within her mind. "No need to thank me, I’ll take the credit if you’re just going to give it away. The strength and determination comes all from you however. But then I think you know this, do you not sweet child?"

[Saha]

Saha couldn’t resist. Though she kept her head down, her eyes gazed around, searching for other people. Something seemed to be somewhere near her, but she couldn’t see or hear anything that wasn’t normal and usual. The sun wasn’t warm any more and she shivered badly.

It had to be the spirits. After she had thought that, suddenly a presence appeared and then she saw the vixen. It surprised her and she looked up, forgetting her respect for Torek and other gods. But while she sat there and watched the animal that seemed so real to her, she was quickly knocked down and then released. Was there someone laughing? Sighing rather annoyed she kneeled down once more as it has to be and looked at the vixen: black fur, green eyes? Rather unusual for foxes, Saha had only heard of some orange, brown or white ones, but actually no black. Despite that it seemed related to her. Wasn’t she too an unusual being? Her green eyes not very often seen and actually not famous – notorious.

Words appeared inside Saha’s mind and she forgot her thoughts and listened carefully. A familiar face, a familiar voice. This was someone she knew, although she didn’t remember when they met the last time. It didn’t matter right now. She wasn’t surprised by the vixen’s last words, a small grin spread over her face. “But still I needed something to thank Torek for, don’t you agree?”, she replied. She felt lucky in this spirit’s presence and so she dared to be a little careless and respectless. The vixen wouldn’t mind, she was sure.

But then she got serious. “Now tell me, what’s the meaning of you being here, my new old friend? I’m glad that help has come, but now …?” She hesitated, listening to herself. “That sounds surprisingly helpless, I suppose”, she then admitted and frowned.

[Stargrace]

The vixen gave a yawn and a leisurely stretch before she lay down upon the ground near the female. Her green eyes stayed attentively focused upon Saha. After a moment's pause the vixen replied in a voice of softness that held an apparent well of strength. "Yes thank Torek for life and show your thanks to him not by stating meaningless words but by embracing the life he has given you, don't be afraid to embrace all that you are, don't be afraid to shine."

The vixen's eyes seemed to blaze with both intensity and light upon her last words hurtling through the young female's mind. Her ageless eyes seemed to not look at her but look into the female and somehow the very act which seemed to breach the Kermite's privacy, seemed to also hold such natural qualities in the intrusive action. It was just the same as one who looked upon their own physical reflection and could then see but most of all, could feel, every aspect of one's being of both the internal and external replicated before one's sight. What were the vixen''s judgements upon gaining such intimate knowledge of the female's soul? This remained unanswered and unseen; the vixen's eyes merely continued to stare into her, the face of the fox remained expressionless.

Like the wind suddenly voicing its existence through the shaking of a tree's branches, the vixen's voice breathed words into the swirling depth of her mind. "Why now? I have always been here, so perhaps I should ask you... why has it taken you so long to come to my home here on this plane? What brings you here asking for my assistance? What makes you feel that irksome word you used...helpless? And what brings that frown to your face?" The vixen arched her brow and resided into silence whilst her knowledgeable eyes remained fixed upon her client's, undoubtedly knowing, and with the slightest of views, seeing the answers to her questions there reflected within the female's soul without needing to hear the verbal reply.

This was a game of value the spirits liked to play upon each living customer they selectively chose to appear to; it was a test of truthfulness as well an evaluation of the living's moral fibres, of one true character. Much weighed upon the words the living gave. And like that of a reflection, the truth always stared one right in the face.

[Saha]

Embracing? To a young woman like Saha, still a child at all, this word meant not very much. She wasn’t even sure if she had understood the exact meaning behind the vixen’s words about embracing Torek’s gifts. Maybe because she wasn’t old enough to think about the true meaning behind some nice phrases. “I don’t understand”, she whispered thoughtful, but she was certain that the vixen would hear it.

Intensive green eyes stared at her for every moment of their meeting and Saha began to feel unconscious, as if someone watched something inside herself that nobody should discover. But there was a strange understanding, the familiarity between the vixen and the female … A weird connection, Saha thought, but overall it feels – just right. There never had been someone who looked into her heart, although she had longed for such a person many times in her previous life. Someone who just understood her and felt the same way, maybe a twin or soulmate. Was the vixen Saha’s soulmate? If that was true, she would try to never ever lose their connection. She wanted a soulmate for life.

Maybe that was the reason for her being here. She longed for a spirit guide, who understood her and guided her through her entire life. As the vixen could hear very clear she was unconscious, thrown in a new surrounding by herself. Saha herself wanted the change! But it also frightened her and she still didn’t know the real problems that would approach her during her way to becoming a successful Keme’Dral. It was the uncertainty that troubled her.

Saha supposed that the vixen already knew everything and didn’t need an answer from her. But it was polite and the spirit wanted her to do so. “I do not believe in things I can’t see”, she said slowly. “And before I went to the Okiya, I was quiet happy with my own little world that only included my brother, Lady Yuiya and the streets of the Phoenix district. But I don’t know the future and what will await me as a Dyma and then Arima. I’m afraid. Although I hate weakness, I’m afraid …” The vixen had forced her to that point, Saha could see it in her intelligent eyes that were so similar to her own ones. And she would have to thank her for doing so when they parted. But at that very moment she was just a girl who wanted to cry because she had discovered how weak she was.

[Stargrace]

The vixen stayed silent. Her green unblinking eyes remained fixed upon the female as she first watched the thoughts take on life within the female's mind before they connected with the female's feelings. She then saw those feelings go on display upon the females face; finally Saha gathered certain thoughts she then articulated.

"You say you do not believe in things you cannot see and yet you still came here - perhaps you believed in your heart. That belief which exists in that metaphoric organ cannot be tained by the mind. It is this you must not be afraid to always acknowledge and heed." The vixen nodded her head and at the end of the action she effortlessly moved on.

"It is only natural to be afraid. Emotions show us that we are alive. Do not think of it as a weakness; think of it instead as a learning curve. A journey of significance, no matter what type or form, always begins with apprehension and uncertainty; this fear will make the final destination, the end of the learning curve a greater experience."

The wind picked up and the vixen raised her acute muzzle into the air and sniffed. It just went to show that one could take the spirit out of the animal but one could not take the animal out of the spirit. Saha only had to look into the vixen's eyes to see that familiar spark of recognition and this spark kept the feeling lingering that there was more to the matter than just that.

The vixen did not give her the time to ponder this further before she spoke again in a casual, almost haughty tone. "The future is not yours to know. In truth, there is so much that has not been decided in life because only you hold that power. It is this that makes it so important you are making the right choice for the right reasons and to make such a choice one has to listen to that beating instrument there." The vixen motioned to the heart with her eyes.

"Perhaps if you explain to me I will be able to shed some light for you and ease your fear somewhat; perhaps... perhaps I could even tell you some of mysteries secrets..." The vixen smirked.

[Saha]

Saha was remembered of her previous life. She had had always some place to return, always a home that had awaited her. It was familiar and it was always there. No day, no second without the knowledge that a home existed. Now there was a new home – but she didn’t know it, it wasn’t as familiar and usual as the old one. Naturally. Maybe she was a fool. Maybe she had to stay around her surroundings and never go away, maybe then she would lead the perfect life. But though she had wished to become a Keme’Dral, to discover the unknown. What was the meaning of this sudden impulse, her self-obsessed dream?

Saha only knew for sure that she would never accept the word ‘fool’ in her thoughts. If she wasn’t sure of herself, she would never be able to concentrate on the things around her, the important things. She reported to the vixen: “Now I know that though I’m afraid I will never go back or run away. Sounds rather senseless, but … god, could that be my heart?” It came to her just like the wind, and suddenly it seemed to be true. She did what her heart had told her. Fine, awesome. Everything clear now?

Saha smiled when the vixen sniffed into the air. It looked so fox-like. A prove that the vixen wasn’t only spirit and knowledge and prudence. “What is it?”, she asked curiously and bent forward, watching the vixen with her beautiful, pitch-black fur.

When the spirit continued Saha listened and then nodded slowly. “So I will do the right things if I do what my heart tells me to do, right?” She thought about it. “And what’s with the people who forgot to listen to her heart?” Saha was not really into philosophy and she never thought much about invisible things, matters of the spirit. As human, she believed, you have to lead a human life and only care about human things. And the human world was a material world. But then she began to understand that material things, success and wishes were actually very close to the spirit world – or philosophy or whatever its name was. Future … would she also need help from others in future like now? Wouldn’t it be good for her if the vixen stayed with her?

Saha didn’t know exactly if the vixen knew her thoughts, but she supposed it knew … parts. That was a thought she wanted to hide, because maybe it was just her wish to have a life-soulmate.

Then she hesitated. “Secrets?”, she whispered, her eyes glowing. Then she shook her head, mostly for herself. She had to be realistic. “Hmm, I guess I’m not afraid any more … because you told me about the heart and all that stuff.” Despite that the vixen would recognize great excitement in Saha’s big green eyes. She loved knowledge about others – and also about herself. Nobody really knew the future … and spirits? Maybe. She let out a little grin. But maybe the vixen wouldn’t tell her, explain that this was sort of an adult thing that she wasn’t allowed to?

[Stargrace]

The vixen tilted her head a little whilst her bewitching eyes continued to appraise the young female. Just her gaze seemed to have the effect of making one reflect on their own self and dare to open Pandora's Box hidden and locked away deep inside. The vixen felt it was too soon, however, for the young female to dare to peer into that box that lay there awaiting the girl's acknowledgement, demanding its truth to be revealed and the female's true potential to become a constant act in itself, just as essential and important as the drawing of life's breath.

The vixen's eyes momentarily looked away from the female's own orbs of green. The vixen looked down to her paws and set her mind to the task of licking them clean. She paused upon hearing the female's words. Her eyes of green returned to look at the same green reflected in the female's own. "Do the right things if you follow your heart? Well that is always a heated debate. Some believe so and some believe otherwise. I believe by following your heart you will do the right thing for you. No matter how selfish and wrong they may seem to others, one has to do what is right and true for their own self alone, not for any other. Do you not agree?"

"We have to live with the choices and decisions we make and live with their consequences too. But of the most importance, we have to live with our selves therefore we have to like and hold respect for one's own person and that has everything to do with the heart. You can never be lonely if you like the person you're alone with." The green of her eyes danced and swirled. She paused for a few long moments before she answered Saha's question. "If one forgets to listen to their heart they lose touch with the most important aspect of life: meaning, emotions - feeling. No, never lose touch with this. "

The vixen then returned to licking her paws. Upon Saha's apparent interest in secrets and her articulated comment about no longer being afraid, the vixen paused in her cleaning and shuffled a little closer to Saha. Her cleaning fast became forgotten as she focused again on the female and the conversation at hand. "Love, hope, fear, faith - these make humanity; these are its sign and note of character. We have spoken about fear. Lets now talk about the other aspects. What lives in your heart? I do not mean companionship; I mean what dreams do you hold? What hopes do you have? What do you want for the future, what do you personally see your future holding?"

It all depended on Saha's answers what and how much the vixen would reveal. There was much she knew but upon looking into the depths of the female and after seeing into Pandora's Box lurking deep inside there, the vixen knew many of the secrets she held would remain just that, secret and as result, silent and safe. In past brightenings, to the present and into the brightenings to come, the vixen would be with the the young female unseen but nonetheless present and silently she would watch her; unknown, she would look deep within and wait for the time her Pandora's box would be opened; only then would these secrets be told.

[Saha]

The animal-like actions, which the vixen concentrated on again and again, comforted Saha. Here was the the proof that the spirit was an animal, maybe even a pet that she could take home with her … was that a new idea? But she wasn’t quite sure yet.

Again she listened to what her spirit said. Doing what was best for yourself sounded wrong somehow … and then it sounded right. “But if …”, she whispered and swallowed. “If doing what’s best for you means hurting another person?” When thinking about it, she recognized that she wasn’t even certain about her own answer. Would she hurt someone else to get something that was really important to her? Was she able to be cruel if the cruelty had a reason? Suddenly she felt confused, thoughts swirling through her mind like leaves. Some of them frightened her!

She tried to focus on the words about feelings, strong passions and deep desires. No, she would never lose them, she wasn’t able to do so! Never, never … really? But surely it would be helpful to keep the advice in mind. She felt that she should remember it for the future – because nobody ever knows what the future will hold for them.

The vixen’s following questions made a deep impact. Of course, because they were important questions. And Saha was quiet, thinking for a long time to make sure that she would find the right, the true answers. Some that were as close to the truth as possible. She found out that when talking about her future, she had to start with her history. “The reason why I wanted to become a Keme’Dral was independence. I simply longed for more freedom, to decide on my own what was best for me.” She hesitated, but then let it just go. The vixen was no clan lord or some high person that would punish her for critizising. “I have studied Aelyrian society and read some books about life and people in other places and cities. They all have more freedom than us, the Kemite women. That surprised and pleased me, and I wanted to be like them. Some day I will leave Zinn’Sunn, but at the moment I’m bound to my birthplace and I can’t go yet. First I have to learn and grow. Being a Keme’Dral was the nearest step to real independence. Keme’Drals never obey a man, don’t they?”

(OOC: Sry for keeping you waiting. Was busy somehow.)

[Stargrace]

The vixen shrugged her shoulders, arched a brow, whilst her eyes stayed intently focused upon the young woman before her. "If doing what's best for you means hurting another person?" Saha softly asked. The vixen tilted her head slightly and then replied with first a firm nod, promptly followed by her words "Whether we intentionally set out to or it happens accidently, people do get hurt - it is a fact of life. One has to find a compromise while at the same time, never compromising one's own self.." The vixen then smiled. "Of course every situation is different..." The vixen fell to silence awaiting Saha's elaboration.

The vixen then gave a leisurely yawn and looked off into the distance. Moments of silence followed the female's words it at first appeared as if the animal spirit had not paid any attention at all to her words. When the silence came to the point of seeming stifling the vixen finally replied in a tone of casualness. "Yes the Keme'Dral hold my respect for one reason in particular..." The vixen's eyes returned to Saha's. "They understand the most important aspects there are about the Kermite culture, life in general and the role females play in this society...they know males are nothing without women; they know a female needs to stroke the male ego, they know females hold weapons of their own that are at each and every woman's disposal, they also know women must act in discreet ways, for is that not what the Keme'Dral are all about in the first place?" The vixen smiled again before she gave a soft sultry chuckle.

[Saha]

Saha thought that the reason why she didn’t understand some of the topics they were talking about was that she had no real life experience. She was also a little bit worried in the back of her head, that she wouldn’t be able to remember all of the vixen’s useful words, and so she tried to absorb all of them just like a sponge. Hm – maybe not all of them but the ones that sounded really interesting and would help her in a certain situation. Eventually nobody knows what life helds for you … And Saha just nodded, eyes green and wide, and listened.

The following silence hit her with might, but at the same moment she got used to it and enjoyed. It was no common silence, but the silence between kindred spirits. Non-talk, that sounded good. But suddenly the words came back and told her about great thoughts and delicate prudence.

She nodded again. “Yes, I believe that’s the heart of being a Keme’Dral. Some day I’ll be like that and then I’ll know that I’ve reached my goal. After that I am able to die in peace, I suppose.” She laughed happily, but the spoken words sounded older than she actually was. She wasn’t even aware of it. It was only thoughts, and she got serious again. “But it’s a shame that becoming a Keme’Dral is the only way to become as powerful as men are in our society.” Now a dark expression, a shadow in the childlike face.

[Stargrace]

The vixen nodded her head at Saha's words before she looked off into the distance. The soft breeze lazily played with loose strands of the female's hair and toyed with the vixen's fur, however it was a action that came unnoticed by the two of the living and the dead, the young and the ancient. The vixen's eyes then turned back to the female. "It has been a long time since I have had conversation with the living, let alone one such as yourself..." The vixen momentarily paused. Her eyes penetrated deep into Saha's own. Like the wind, her cryptic message remained unnoticed. She finished her speech clause. "And as much as I have enjoyed the chatter I must ask, what else do you seek from me?"

The vixen continued. "I am your guide, my eyes have always been and will always be on you. Tell me, what other guidance do you need of me? What are your future plans? What are you going to do with your life before time passes through the hour glass and the particles become fewer until no more brightenings exist... Everyone has some type of purpose in life, what is yours?"

The vixen gave a leisurely yawn and then another question floated into her mind she instantly verbalised. We have spoken of the heart...the heart should reign over life, do you let it voice its wants and needs? What lies in there?" The vixen directed her gaze to Saha's heart and then probed the young female eager for deeper truths to become revealed... it would be soon, she felt it in her being, the flower would soon bloom. But for now the innocent Keme'Dral remained ignorant, ignorant of the world and of the essence of life.